Portobello Pizza

Gang, lately I really have been making an effort to be more healthy. And by lately, I mean the past three days. And let’s not get crazy….I will not be doing Paleo. If you can’t tell by literally every other post on this blessed blog, I love cheese. I can’t give it up. I just simply….can’t. Also, carbs. Carbs were given to us by the gods many, many moons ago. And sometimes you just cannot turn away. Like at the never-ending breadsticks at Olive Garden. That would be like saying, “No, I’m good” when offered a bucket filled with unicorn hair and fairy dust. And buttery garlic.

Despite how hard it is, sometimes you in your life, you come to a point where you eventually feel guilty for stuffing your insides with carbohydrates and buttery garlic goodness. Unless your Mama June on  Here Come’s Honey Boo Boo. If you judge me for watching that show religiously, I judge you for judging me. Who’s the winner now?

I follow this health blog on Facebook called Rodale Health News. Every once in a while, I click through their articles to make myself feel a little better about the gluttonous, yet still sexy, pig I have become. A few days ago, they posted an article on healthy eating hacks. This idea was one of them.

So basically, out of boredom and a desire to be a smidge healthier, this recipe was birthed from the loins of my brain. I made it completely from items I had on hand and Lazaro loved them. As well as my bff Cristin and roommate who claims to hate mushrooms.

Personally, any time I cook something that someone “hates” and they like it when I make it…I consider that a huge win. I’m almost challenged when someone says they hate something. In my head, I greet those statements with a bow like they do in fencing and, “Challenge accepted.” I mean, I have never trained and/or competed in a triathlon but, I feel like it’s the same feeling.

This is probably one of the reasons I’m such a good person.

However, if you’re looking for a quick, low carb dinner, try these. They take about 5 minutes to assemble and 5 minutes to cook. Plus, they save you from about 30 grams of carbs per serving. That’s a definite plus in my book!

Portobello Pizza with Turkey Pepperoni and Goat Cheese

Portobello Pizzas

8 Large Portobello Mushrooms

Extra Virgin Olive Oil

Dried Rosemary, Oregano, Garlic

Salt & Pepper


Large Jar Pizza Sauce

1 Cup Dry Red Wine

½ Teaspoon each:

Italian Seasoning




Cracked Red Pepper

Handful of Spinach & Arugula

Chopped Parsley

So, this recipe is really quick and something I just threw together. It really only took about 10 minutes to prepare everything. And, please don’t judge me for using jarred sauce. I did it just this once because I had it on hand and I was trying to be fast. However, you’ll notice that I jazzed it up quite a bit. So, there’s that. If you have more time than I did at this point in my life, use this recipe found here.

Start by removing the stems and washing your mushrooms thoroughly. Coat them in olive oil and dried seasonings and if possible, let them marinate for about 2 hours.

If you’re using jarred pizza sauce, begin the jazzing process now. Pour in your wine and seasonings along with the spinach, parsley,

Portobello Pizza with Turkey Pepperoni, Banana Peppers and Blue Cheese Crumbles

and arugula. Stirring frequently, let it start to bubble and simmer, uncovered on medium-low. This will help it thicken and become ultra-flavorful.

{See how many veggies we’re giving ourselves? Your mom will be so proud.}

For this recipe, I grilled each mushroom on my George Foreman for about 3 minutes before assembling. It just makes sure that they cook all the way through instead of relying on your oven to get the job done.

Once you’re done cooking each mushroom, you’re ready to assemble them.

The next part is really difficult so, shut up and pay attention.

Lay the mushroom upside down so the stem side is facing the ceiling. Spread some sauce on top. Then your preferred toppings. Then cheese.

Got it? If not, re-read.

If you’re using a pizza stone, which I strongly suggest, let it hang out in your oven while you pre-heat it to 475. Yep. We’re going hard, ladies.

I rotated two “pizzas” at a time and cooked them for about 4.5-5 minutes, just until the cheese melted.

Seriously, two pizzas in and I was stuffed. So healthy and delicious. I hope you try them with your own ideas and report back!

Portobello Pizza with Turkey Pepperoni, Banana Peppers and Mozzarella